Neurodiversity in Business: Masking, Passing & Authenticity

Unpacking the hidden cost of masking, the power of intersectional awareness, and what true authenticity looks like for neurodivergent professionals.

In a world built for neurotypical norms, authenticity for ADHD and neurodivergent individuals isn’t just a mindset—it’s a daily act of courage shaped by identity, intersectionality, and lived experience.

Navigating Identity, Intersectionality, and Authenticity in a Neurotypical World

Recognizing the Mask: Can We Choose When to Unmask?

One of the most misunderstood aspects of neurodiversity is the deeply complex experience of adhd masking—and the myth that adhd neurodivergent people can simply decide when to mask and unmask. As my friend and fellow ADHD coach Ron Sosa puts it, "That mask is so ingrained at probably such a young age…they didn't even recognize it." Much like many coping mechanisms developed under social pressure, adhd masking isn't typically a conscious choice but rather an automatic adaptation to the world's expectations. This phenomenon is tricky: the empowering language of "choosing to unmask" may sound liberating, but for many, it doesn't reflect reality. Indeed, suggesting otherwise can feel invalidating or even shaming to those for whom unmasking feels impossible, highlighting the need for greater adhd intersectionality awareness.

Superpowers and Struggles: Empowerment vs. Lived Experience

The "ADHD is a superpower" narrative is enticing. For some, embracing this framing can transform internalized shame into pride. Yet, hearing this perspective while in crisis—burnt out, overwhelmed, or experiencing suicidal thoughts—can actually intensify feelings of isolation.  It can be really damaging…only creates more shame in the person you're talking to. Acknowledgment of this tension is vital for the broader community striving for both honesty and empowerment, particularly when discussing neurodiversity in business contexts.

The Timeline of Intersectional Self-Discovery

Ron's personal journey illustrates how unraveling the threads of identity is rarely linear or straightforward—a critical aspect of adhd intersectionality awareness. Diagnosed with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) as a toddler, Ron did not learn of this diagnosis until many years later, due to family denial and secrecy. His realization of being gay came next, from fleeting moments of childhood curiosity to internal acceptance in high school, all while trying to "choose to not be gay" for the sake of familial harmony. The path to an ADHD diagnosis was similarly circuitous: professional struggles, relationship tensions, and low frustration tolerance propelled him toward seeking help as a young adult.

For Ron, official diagnoses weren't just labels—they were critical moments of validation and understanding for an adhd neurodivergent individual navigating multiple marginalized identities. He describes the process as "diving into the rabbit hole of self-discovery." Yet, having vital information withheld—such as his early autism diagnosis—shaped his self-perception profoundly, underscoring how secrecy and stigma around difference can have lasting consequences.

Burnout, Resilience, and Navigating Crisis

The COVID-19 pandemic became a crucible for Ron's mental health, compounding pressures as a business owner and leader in veterinary medicine—a stark example of the challenges facing neurodiversity in business environments. The relentless demands led to profound burnout—a turning point compelling him to revisit psychiatric support. The conversation with his psychiatrist, resulting in an adult autism diagnosis, was both shocking and illuminating. Rather than dismissing the suggestion, Ron did his own research, ultimately recognizing himself in the literature.

This journey highlights the interconnectedness of marginalized identities—being neurodivergent, queer, a child of divorce—each layering new challenges and insights, demonstrating the importance of adhd intersectionality awareness. Importantly, Ron credits his darkest moments with strengthening his resolve: "All of the trials and tribulations in life I have used as fuel to move me forward," fostering resilience and a proactive response to future setbacks.

Empathy, Blind Spots, and Intersectional Awareness

A recurring motif is empathy—its development, its limits, and its relationship to intersectionality. Ron and I have candidly discussed how surviving adversity can make one resilient, but may also create a "blind spot" toward those who process hardship differently. For Ron, empathy is rooted in the awareness of marginalization: "I have a deeper level of empathy…because I don't want anyone to feel the way I have felt." Yet, frustrations surface when others appear "to wallow" rather than take action—a complex dynamic for many who have had to claw their way forward, particularly adhd neurodivergent individuals who have learned to navigate multiple systems of oppression.

Redefining Productivity and Identity in the Workplace

Ron's experience as an entrepreneur spotlights the adhd neurodivergent struggle with conventional work rhythms and illustrates the evolving conversation around neurodiversity in business. He observes his productivity often appears in bursts—achieving in two days what might take others a week—followed by periods of low output and recovery. Recognizing and accepting this rhythm, rather than forcing conformity to a neurotypical standard or engaging in adhd masking, has been key to his success. As Ron humorously says, "It depends"—on the person, on the task, on the environment—summarizing the inherent variability in neurodivergent living and working.

Conclusion: Standing Tall in Authenticity

The conversation between Ron and me delivered a nuanced, compassionate exploration of intersectionality, identity, and the realities of living—and thriving—as a neurodivergent person. Their stories remind us that unmasking and embracing our authentic selves is a deeply individual journey, requiring reflection, community, and often professional support. Understanding adhd intersectionality awareness and creating space for neurodiversity in business are essential steps toward a more inclusive entrepreneurial landscape. In Ron's words, "I'm not broken. I'm not this weird alien I thought I was…I can stand tall in who I am."

For so many navigating layered identities and hidden diagnoses, standing tall is itself a radical—and remarkable—act.

 If you'd like to hear the full episode on the ADHD-ish Podcast, you can do that here.