Winging It

For most of my life, I would just follow my impulses wherever they lead me. If I felt like doing something, I did it. If I didn't feel like it, I didn't. Most of the time, I didn't even try to force myself. It just didn't work. I can be very stubborn with myself. After a while, I started noticing that my impulses took me in all kinds of directions and once I got there, I would be looking around, scratching my head, wondering what the hell I was doing there. Or questioning myself, sometimes...

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Making a You Turn

Most of us go through life with some kind of plan. OK, maybe it's not completely all figured out and there might not be a specific timeline or scheduled checkpoints along the way, but you have a direction and a pretty solid sense of where you're going. And then, seemingly all of a sudden, you find yourself questioning everything, feeling a bit lost and spinning your wheels. If you're ever been through this, you know how disorienting it is and how much confidence gets lost in the process. It's...

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Does this Decision Look Good on Me?

Everything we do is a reflection of who we are. Every little thing, and of course the big ones too. Of course, you already know this, but unless you are keeping it in mind and really paying attention to your choices and how you make them, you can find yourself creating a life that just doesn't feel like the one you should be having or set out to create. Most people just drift along through life, making it up as they go along and feeling totally confused when things don't go their way. Well,...

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I Caught Myself Doing it Again

I like to think of myself as open-minded. And more than that, I like to think of myself as positive, growth-oriented and someone who is committed to continuous personal evolution. I have worked with therapists off and on throughout my adult life and have been to a variety of healers of various modalities. I worked with a shamanic healer, a faith healer, a chiropractor who practiced muscle testing and energy healing. I have pulled tarot cards, angel cards, diffused essential oils, studied...

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Don't Outsource Your Self Esteem

It can be hard to generate self-confidence in this day and age. It like insecurity, social anxiety, and imposter syndrome are nearly universal among young women, who ruthlessly compare themselves to one another and find themselves lacking. One of the reasons for this, I believe is because we seek permission from others to be ourselves. We outsource our self-esteem by allowing whether others approve of us or not to determine whether or not we are able to approve of ourselves. It can be tough...

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Hope has Nothing to do With it

Nearly every person I know has a great, big shiny dream. They can envision themselves living the new life they will have when this dream becomes reality and often daydream about it happening "someday.' Whether they want to start a business, live in a foreign country, adopt a child, go back to school or transform their health, most of us long for something we don't have and believe our lives will be better, happier or more satisfying when we do. And the majority of us won't ever see those...

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You Are Responsible

I am 100% responsible for my life. The person I have become, how much or how little I have accomplished, how much I own and how much I owe. How many friends I have and how many enemies. The lines on my face and the letters after my name. It's all on me. And I am totally willing to accept this reality and believe I am empowered by it. 

Where I grew up, there were plenty of people who had a leg up in life from the start. Their parents had money, status, and connections and they taught...

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Choose Your Habits or They Will Choose You

Have you ever noticed how everything you think, feel and do eventually becomes a habit? It starts out innocently enough, that first puff of someone else's cigarette at a party in middle school and the next thing you know, you're a pack a day smoker. And, I'm not just talking about the addictive stuff. Obviously, if you smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol or use drugs, you are very likely to form an addictive habit, but it's just as likely that you are going to form a habit around drinking coffee...

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Love the Outlier

I am in another city. I don't live here, I am visiting. Well, not exactly visiting either. I'm here for a wedding. The wedding of a very good friend of my husband's and mine. He is a very pale, red-headed white guy with long hair, who always wears hats and is a brilliant, introverted engineer. She is an exuberant and delightful Jamaican woman who can captivate a room of strangers with her gregarious nature. They own a successful company together and a couple of houses. And now they are...

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Who Do You Think You Are?

Human beings love to label themselves. Woman. Married. Coach. Buddhist. Dog lover. Coffee drinker. We also love to label others. It's easier to remember people when you have a way to sort and categorize them. It's just human nature and our brains are wired to do it automatically. But, even though it's the way we operate, and there's no doubt that putting labels on people makes it easier to sort and file them than just trying to recall every single individual characteristic, there is a great...

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